It’s a natural instinct to want to name your child something that doesn’t have any baggage associated with it. Unpleasant memories, bad associations — the thing with growing up as a boy in England like the Guy did, the thing with growing up as a small, Asian boy in racist England, the thing with growing up as a small, Asian, frequently bullied, opinionated and bull-headed boy in racist England, let’s say, is that for every ‘normal’ name out there, you will have met someone with that name who either:

1. bullied you
   
2. teased you
   
3. was a dick to you
   
4. hated you
   
5. you bullied
   
6. you teased
   
7. you were a dick to
   
8. you hated.