Jersey Girl

You have to imagine what the people in New Jersey think of me when they see me show up at their clinic, pasty white and shivering.

"It cold enough for you?"

Why do people say this? No, it's not. I like it really brisk. I like it to be razor sharp. I like the wind to be able to flay the skin off road kill, and ice particles in the air to draw blood from exposed skin.

It snowed night before last, the 2-4 inches that they were threatening me with at the beginning of the day, rather than the more malicious 4-6 they'd graduated to by the end. The clinic's office manager gave me a ride. Today it's record lows. Last time it was this cold, Grover Cleveland was President. -15 last night. -14 tonight.

The east coasters watched me walk into the office with the Office Manager, and instantly started giving the California Girl grief. "What, you moving in with [office manager] now?"

California Girl: "There's this stuff on the ground. White stuff. And it's cold and poof!"

Jersey Girls: "That's snow, honey. It comes down from the sky."

CG: (with deep suspicion) "Things don't come down out of the sky."

JGs: "Like rain, except frozen."

CG: "Pigeons sometimes drop stuff out of the sky. Out of the sky is bad. I've seen movies."

JGs: "Didn't feel comfortable driving?"

CG: "There was stuff! On the ground! From the sky!"